whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Randomize
