She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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