It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
