Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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