if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize
