I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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