im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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