Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
