Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Blow job season was short but glorious.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
