kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Randomize
