Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
