I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Randomize
