Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Randomize
