He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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