Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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