dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
