And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
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