Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize
