Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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