OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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