forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Randomize
