I didn't shave. On purpose
I don't think brook has ever known best
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize
