Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
