We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
we made out on top of his cat.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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