no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Randomize
