Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
It's blow job season.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Randomize
