i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Randomize
