She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
