no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Barsexuality is the new black.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
