We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
