he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
Randomize