just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Randomize
