she looked like the before picture.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
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