it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
cat food counts as protein by the way
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Randomize
