Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize
