He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
