Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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