Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
mondays should just be called national damage control day
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
