You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize
