she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
