I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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