If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Welp...herpes.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Randomize