Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
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