I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
