batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
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