Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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