I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
