im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
