at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
MIDGETS
????
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
They have beer where we have blood.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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