Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
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